I desperately needed to shift from dealing with and over identifying with my issues to letting myself and the key folks in my life off the hook. I am working on launching a business that has the potential to help and bring joy to many women and I spent this year facing my issues head on, literally ignoring all other considerations. It was time to complete that work and lay those issues to rest and let the authentic empowered step into leadership and optimism. My concerns attending a QHHT session was that I wouldn't go under, that my ego and hyperactive intelligence would undermine the process. What I learned in the session was I was able to see my ego wanted to circumvent the process and get back to an authentic place. I used the tool of describing things and picking up on colors to help me with this. Whenever I felt like I was going to say something that was BS or felt afraid to go in a direction I started describing the visions that were popping up. At first I thought this would be frustrating when I listened to the playback, but as I take it less transactional I am gaining insight through what seemed like a trip off track. In the actual session, once I got past my sleepiness it felt like I was able to discern the different aspects of myself - when my ego wanted to go vs. when I felt authentic. I felt like I was speaking from my heart and crying from my wounded child. I don't feel like my wounded child has as much to cry about anymore. I really enjoyed how much time Tim committed to me. We spent at least 1.15 hours on the phone after scheduling the appointment. Then we talked for about 2 hours about my whole life before spending 2 hours in the hypnosis session and about another 45 mins or so afterwards. After listening to the session recording as the days pass and I listen again and the energy of it all sinks in I realize that the work GOT DONE. That story is completed. I feel like I'm off the wheel of perpetually creating from a broken place. I've jumped to a new reality. A lot of my healing had to do with feeling and perceiving myself as dis-empowered, disrespected around my family and doomed to a life of unrequited love in my partner. The turmoil I've felt around my relationship with my mother is diminishing. I have a lot to talk about with my mom. I have a lot of listening to do. I needed to get to a plateau in healing so that I may assist and uplift her healing. I am beyond grateful to feel the capacity within me to do that and hold space for her and the rest of my family. With the relationship and connection with a past partner that's been challenging, I feel like I'm out of the lab rat maze and can see it more clearly. His turmoil was bringing up mine and I literally feel like he was running me through the paces or that I was like a mouse being batted around by the tail. I'm not mad. I feel confused to not feel connected with him but I don't feel lost in space or a lack of love for him. The big take away here is Letting Go is Always a Win-Win, it lets you and them off the hook. In terms of physical health I think it is good and that there's more work to do. I wanted to come out the session with all things healed but I respect I can only process and use but so much information at a time. But since the emotional wounds are what's behind most of my physical manifestations I suspect I'll see them more clearly as time does its thing with me and I integrate more. If you are thinking of scheduling a QHHT session I would recommend taking this time to listen to yourself and respect that at first blush you might not know what you are talking to yourself about. We speak in so many different languages, to ourselves and the world and we are SO domesticated we need to be patient as we unravel it all and grow our self-intimacy.
December 30, 2017